I’m afraid to be too amazing, because my brilliance was used as a club against my brothers, to make them feel bad about themselves.
“Why can’t you be more like your sister?”
Great. Thanks. Now the better I do the worse they’ll feel about themselves.
Oh, yes… now that’s a belief I am happy to reveal and release! I had no idea I even felt that way! In fact, I always used it as an opportunity to feel bad about myself, because in typical moments of sibling rivalry, I would use it as a club against them, too.
I admit, at times I have used my gift for evil purposes. I am not proud of this, but I am learning to let go of my guilt over it, because I was just a stupid kid.
A brilliant stupid kid who grew into a brilliant stupid broken adult.